Single Parent
"Parenthood: That state of being better chaperoned than you were before marriage. " ~Marcelene Cox
I first want to tip my hat to all people who are single parents ~ full time. I have no idea how you do it! With that said, I'm a part time single parent. This happens for a week at a time when my husband goes away for work and it happens for up to months and a year at a time when he is deployed. It has happened more and more frequently for me in the last five years and each time I find myself as a single parent the same thing happens ~ I'm exhausted.
Being a single parent is equal to being a new parent. I'm outnumbered, overwhelmed and unprepared. I'm an extreme extrovert who really loves to talk and be around people. When these people are a teen and two younger children, which I love dearly, I don't have an ounce of social left. This has to be because all conversations have to be fielded by me. I'm alone in answering the area of a triangle, I'm the only one explaining for the 100th time why we can't have a cat and I'm the last man standing when it comes time to confront the child who carved his name into the arm of the leather sofa. (With a rather nice rendition of himself smiling, I think he was trying to label his permanent parking space)
During the second deployment, our oldest son took it upon himself to ward off all adult males within a 10 mile radius. It took me weeks before I realized what he was doing. After the first night of Tae Kwon Do when the master came over to talk to me about helping teach the kids, Mitch circled me three times and then proceeded to introduce me as Mrs. "insert father's name boldly and loudly here" It was hilarious. I appreciate his boldness and his underlying belief that he had to stake out his father's territory in his absence.
Our middle child's perceived job when Dad is away is to make sure that I have fun. This entails playing through every board game we have in the house at least once. We do the puzzles, we realize (for the third time )that we don't have all the MouseTrap pieces anymore and we play hours of Uno. Yesterday when I picked her up at a party she dragged me in to the last round of laser tag so I could join her and shake up my continuous cycle of work. I appreciate this effort and her underlying idea that I don't have fun when Dad is gone.
The youngest helps me sharpen my diplomacy skills. There are days I swear I'm part of the model United Nations with the high level talks we have to have to maintain peace. With one adult in the house, all arguments are deferred directly to me, there are no backups. All grievous behavior is mine to deal with. All meals have to be rendered from my hands. All daily chores are done only when I do them and last but not least all household issues have to be handled by me. I'm two parents worth of responsibility rolled into one very tired mom.
In hindsight, I knew there would be days like this. I'm thankful that my days with my husband away are filled with the activity of our children and our life. Each day that I manage ALL of the parenting duties makes me appreciate even more the days when we are all together. Until then, it is time to take my vitamins, start the coffee and bring on another action packed day!
I first want to tip my hat to all people who are single parents ~ full time. I have no idea how you do it! With that said, I'm a part time single parent. This happens for a week at a time when my husband goes away for work and it happens for up to months and a year at a time when he is deployed. It has happened more and more frequently for me in the last five years and each time I find myself as a single parent the same thing happens ~ I'm exhausted.
Being a single parent is equal to being a new parent. I'm outnumbered, overwhelmed and unprepared. I'm an extreme extrovert who really loves to talk and be around people. When these people are a teen and two younger children, which I love dearly, I don't have an ounce of social left. This has to be because all conversations have to be fielded by me. I'm alone in answering the area of a triangle, I'm the only one explaining for the 100th time why we can't have a cat and I'm the last man standing when it comes time to confront the child who carved his name into the arm of the leather sofa. (With a rather nice rendition of himself smiling, I think he was trying to label his permanent parking space)
During the second deployment, our oldest son took it upon himself to ward off all adult males within a 10 mile radius. It took me weeks before I realized what he was doing. After the first night of Tae Kwon Do when the master came over to talk to me about helping teach the kids, Mitch circled me three times and then proceeded to introduce me as Mrs. "insert father's name boldly and loudly here" It was hilarious. I appreciate his boldness and his underlying belief that he had to stake out his father's territory in his absence.
Our middle child's perceived job when Dad is away is to make sure that I have fun. This entails playing through every board game we have in the house at least once. We do the puzzles, we realize (for the third time )that we don't have all the MouseTrap pieces anymore and we play hours of Uno. Yesterday when I picked her up at a party she dragged me in to the last round of laser tag so I could join her and shake up my continuous cycle of work. I appreciate this effort and her underlying idea that I don't have fun when Dad is gone.
The youngest helps me sharpen my diplomacy skills. There are days I swear I'm part of the model United Nations with the high level talks we have to have to maintain peace. With one adult in the house, all arguments are deferred directly to me, there are no backups. All grievous behavior is mine to deal with. All meals have to be rendered from my hands. All daily chores are done only when I do them and last but not least all household issues have to be handled by me. I'm two parents worth of responsibility rolled into one very tired mom.
In hindsight, I knew there would be days like this. I'm thankful that my days with my husband away are filled with the activity of our children and our life. Each day that I manage ALL of the parenting duties makes me appreciate even more the days when we are all together. Until then, it is time to take my vitamins, start the coffee and bring on another action packed day!
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