"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."  ~Ambrose Redmoon

 I've already disclosed that I hate running. The little voice in my head kicks in when I begin to run for exercise, reminding me that I hate to run and that I'm not good at it. I'm the one on the treadmill blaring Bon Jovi so I can ignore that little voice and burn the calories that my midlife body refuses to let go of.
 I've had the carnal desire lately to run, but not the good kind. For the last few days, I've wanted to turn around and run away, like a child. That kind of run when you take off without a plan of where to go or what you are doing, but just that you know you have to get away. The only thing that would stop that run when I was a child was exhaustion. That type of run had an energy behind it that was from somewhere deep inside. As a child, running like that always made everything okay, as if just knowing that getting away quickly on my own two feet was just the medicine for whatever made me run in the first place. When I was a child, we ran away from snakes and bee hives and dogs that were barking and imaginary scary things.
  The things making me want to run are so much scarier now as an adult. Aging parents, teenage son issues, daily news reports, friends in pain, splintered families, these are the things that are staring me in the face. When I least expect it the desire to run hits and I can feel my feet start to lift from the ground. In may minds eye I can see myself turn and run out the door.
  I believe it is now, these times, especially, that I have to stand. I have to stand firm and face the things that make me want to run. Gone are the times of childhood when there were no implications to running away. The things that I want to run from now are intertwined with the things that I care the most about. The things that would make me want to run away are the things that stir my emotions to stay and fight. The things worth fighting for, family, the future of our country, the future of our child, the families that have no energy left to champion their own cause, these things need for me to stand firm. These things are depending on me to not run.
 The only thing that ran today was the little girl who let fear take over. In her place stands a woman, on her own two feet, with courage to face her fears and do what must be done.